BY KENESHA COLLINS SEPTEMBER 16th, 2019
If you’re currently dating right now, you know it’s tough out there. The rules have changed due to social media and dating sites. It can be overwhelming when there are so many options to choose from. In the rare instance you find someone you click with, you may want to invest time into the person. You may think a man can be molded into the right person for you. Wrong! If you look back at your past relationships, there were giant, screaming bright red flags you chose to ignore. If you’re rusty at dating, and need some helpful hints, here’s 5 ways you’ll know the guy you’ve met, or dating isn’t right for you.
He’s a Liar
There are several comedy shows I’ve watched explaining how lying is to a man like breathing. It’s natural, and you should just accept it. That’s not the case. The lies might start out small like he was over his friend’s house, or he was working late. If you’ve noticed that his little white lies are becoming more frequent, this is a pattern of behavior that will only get worse. All men don’t lie. Some men are honest with the women they date. If you’re consistently catching him in a lie, he’s not someone you’ll ever be able to trust.
He’s Not Over His Ex
This is a big one. I’m finding more and more men are attached to more than one woman at a time. If he just broke up with someone, he’s is not going to be able to give you his full attention. There is a grieving process everyone goes through, and men are no different. He’s not over his relationship if he constantly compares you to her, or he can’t make it a whole day without bringing her name up. If you confront him about talking about his ex too much, he may get testy with you. These men may be good relationship material in the future, but if you don’t give him time, he will not be able to give you all of him.
He is His First Priority
Does he talk about himself all the time? Does he ever ask you how your day was before jumping into the details of his? Does he offer to pick up dinner when you’re working late? If the answer all of those questions is no, then don’t expect this relationship to be 50/50. He might be used to being catered to in previous relationships. If you discuss this with him, but you still continue to carry the majority of the weight, move on.
He Tries to Impose His Beliefs on You
Religious beliefs can be very important. Some people who have different religious and spiritual beliefs may have very successful relationships. The only way they survive is mutual respect. If your guy denounces your beliefs, and is close minded, you may have a problem if your relationship progresses. One of you may have to convert, and it will most likely be you.
He Can’t Admit When He’s Wrong
No one is perfect, and we all make mistakes. Saying “I’m sorry,” means a lot when you’ve made a mistake. Being in relationship with someone who can’t accept they’ve messed up can be frustrating. If you have disagreements, both parties must take accountability. If his mistakes are somehow turned into yours he’s manipulative, and not the right fit for you.
Dating should be fun. The process of meeting new people and having new experiences should be enlightening. Devoting your time into a person who isn’t right is like dropping $100 dollar bills into a bottomless pit. You’re never going to get your return investment.
Kenesha Collins is a freelance writer, editor, and blogger. She has written and edited for Evansville Parent Magazine, Keep Evansville Beautiful, and WordSmooth. Follow her on Twitter: https://twitter.com/kenesha_collins.