BY KENESHA COLLINS SEPTEMBER 16th, 2019
I felt discouraged about my life earlier this year, but I didn’t know why. I’m happily single, but I shunned the idea of finding someone whose right for me. I’m gainfully employed, but I kept getting turned down for opportunities within my company. I accepted this fate, and didn’t entertain the idea of more for myself. I was exhausted all the time. I compared my life to everyone else’s. I concluded other people were leading wealthier, happier, and more satisfying lives than I was. This way of thinking was ridiculous as we are all born with unique gifts. Every person I encountered couldn’t have a life that is leaps and bounds better than mine. It occurred to me I had been settling for less than I deserved.
I’m taking a major leap of faith by moving to Texas. I weighed my options and found that all my business aspirations will come to fruition in Texas. I’ve developed a lot in Tennessee, and gained valuable knowledge, but I found myself settling for less than I know I’m capable of. You might be in the same situation. You may want to get a better paying job, a promotion, write a book, start a business, or obtain a successful relationship. You may currently have a job that pays the bills, but doesn’t challenge you or pay you what you’re worth. You may be in a relationship, but it’s not fulfilling. Lifelong dreams of plans of travel are socked away in the back of your mind under ‘never going to happen.’ That’s settling for less. It’s accepting what you can get out of fear of pursuing something better.
If you’re feeling stuck in a rut, you can get out of it. There are ways to change your life.
Do you give everything your absolute best? Settling for less can attribute to you not trying. Procrastinating, making excuses, being late and missing deadlines are examples you’re not trying. If you are this person, the first step is owning it. I will be the first to tell you that ambitious, hard working people find you frustrating. Your co-workers pick up the slack for you. If you don’t go for the best, then you can’t expect to be handed the best life has to offer. By giving your all, the universe will recognize your efforts, and things will begin to align.
I wrote a blog post about toxic people a few months ago. I discussed being in relationships with people who are negative and drain energy. Relationships should be enriching and should fill you up emotionally. If they don’t, you need to take stock of the people in your life. If a person is just taking up space, and not adding to your life – they must go. That may sound harsh, but it’s the truth. You can talk to the person(s) about how you feel, but most likely, these people already know what they’re doing. They may be down about their lives, and want you to be there with them. If you suddenly succeed, they may be called to make changes themselves. They may not be ready to progress. Your best bet is to skip the speech and bid them farewell.
You spend much of your time at your job or in your career. Your field should be financially lucrative and should provide opportunities for growth. If you’re not being utilized at work to your full potential, schedule a meeting with your supervisor or manager. Get information about possible projects you can get involved with. Keep ample records of your performance and discuss promotional opportunities. You may need to further your education to obtain the position you want. If you continue to run into dead ends, seek a better paying job elsewhere.
Not settling may include taking some risks. If you’re bored with the town you live in then research areas that may fit your lifestyle more. If you have at least half a year’s salary saved and a business plan, it may be time to start your own business.
Accepting less is comfortable and safe. It gives you an excuse not to take risks. It allows you to not hold yourself accountable. You’re given one life. Just one. You can continue to watch people live out their dreams or grab a few of your own.
Kenesha Collins is a freelance writer, editor, and blogger. She has written and edited for Evansville Parent Magazine, Keep Evansville Beautiful, and WordSmooth. Follow her on Twitter: https://twitter.com/kenesha_collins.